the erotic is the nurturer or nursemaid of all our deepest knowledge. - audre lorde
Last summer, I was having drinks with some friends from school when they immediately recognized a song I had never heard with a punchy beat over sensual vocals playing overhead at the local bar.
You say you got a girl
And how you want me How you want me when you got a girl? The feelin' is reckless Of knowin' you're selfish Knowin' I'm desperate
My female friend affirmed how much she liked the song and album while my male friend rolled his eyes, snarling over how lame it was that females idolized her, dismissing her music as glorifying “side chicks”, and decrying how bizarre it was that her songs were becoming anthems for girls and women alike. I was perplexed by two things: my male friend’s extreme lack of empathy and his use of this derogative term “side chick”- the modern mistress. I was curious to understand what the song was and why, not only my female friend liked it but why I, too, was enamored after listening to the artist’s album for a week straight.